Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Oh, Justin

How could you destroy a perfect union?

How could you run from your older, wiser (and stunningly beautiful) girlfriend into the arms of that buxom crumpet, Scarlett J. ??

Were you getting tired of the simple life of commitment? The quiet nights in and the threatening, mature ideas of co-habiting?

Justin. Are you longing to run free with abandon like former gal pal, Britney, baring your twigs and berries for the rest of the world's keen eyes? Dying to dance and gyrate in the arctic, white blast of a Vegas night club while Paul Oakenfold spins tunes more obscure than Starry Eyed Surprise (actually, I can say with first hand experience that's a pretty cool experience)?

Justin, you bum me out.

You give credence to my half hearted conviction that relationships between young men and old chicks don't work. You make me question your (and the rest of your young-man brethren) maturity and priority and commitment-ity.

Now, I know all about workplace relationships. I've even fallen prey to the seduction of a co-worker or two in my days. Still, I can't imagine how you let your guard down while shooting your new video with someone with a name that sounds like Harlett Hohansson.

Even more surprising is that poor Cameron had to run away to Nashville Nashville? to get away from they prying eye of the paparazzi.

I hope it all works out for Ms. Diaz. Maybe she can cook up her own office romance. Jude Law is skanky, but he's so so hot.


The Notorious N.A.T said...

I must have missed this little piece of star gossip. Of course, I knew that JT & Cameron were possibly on the outs, but I hadn't heard the why...

And is Cameron seeing my BF Jude Law??? Whhaaa...I was so hoping that now that Sienna is out of the picture, he'd miraculously find me. And marry. Me.

Micah said...

C'mon...it's freakin' Scarlett Johansson! She's the most beautiful actress working today. There's no way he could've resisted her siren song.

Sure Diaz is pretty, but I find her annoying when I see her, whether on "The Tonight Show" (all giggly and airheaded pimping Charlie's Angels with those other two harpies) or on "Oprah" (remember: re-elect Bush and rape will be legal).