If I were wearing a belt, I'd take it out a notch.
If I were wearing elastic pants, I'd sit back with ease and continue to shovel food in my mouth.
But I'm not.
I've got some cream colored cargo pants on... and a cream colored, wool cable-knit sweater.
So I feel incredibly uncomfortable.
And it's only lunch time at work.
So help me God, I just don't know if I'll make it through Thanksgiving dinner.